RUBILYKSKOYE INBOX.

[explosion]

TELEPATHY • HOLOGRAM • LETTERS • DELIVERIES • ACTION

✿ Rubi-telepathy (easy mode) feels different to ✦ Wanda-telepathy (hard mode).

Comments

[explosion]

Should we have a dedicated day to bitch about House? Maybe Sunday brunches where we sip tea and spill it at the same time?

[unconscionable]

And bikkies?

[explosion]

Do you think I would allow us to have Sunday brunch to shit talk House and not have bikkies?

The shame you must feel.

[unconscionable]

So much shame. Should never have made such a grievous mistake.

But yeah, a Sunday brunch sounds good.

[explosion]

Do we have a few before we tell him what he's missing out on the best bikkies in the world?

The company obviously wonderful, too. And you.

[unconscionable]

And me.

Let's keep it between us for now. Don't want him to think we're planning an intervention.

[explosion]

That's a good idea.

[ One she hadn't considered. She really doesn't wish for House to shut either of them out. ]

Hopefully, we can tell him when he feels more open to it. I don't like the look of defeat on his face. It makes his eyes less bright, like the ocean is sad.

[unconscionable]

That's really poetic.

[explosion]

When I'm inspired, it just comes out. Feel free to call me Wandaspeare, but know that many will feel insecure when they hear that name.

[unconscionable]

There are probably people here who don't know Shakespeare? If House can take credit for Led Zoe's riffs you can pinch a sonnet.

[explosion]

He takes credit for those riffs? The audacity of this man!

[ And yet, so in character that Wanda isn't surprised at all. ]

You won't Et tu, Brute? me if I claim I wrote those plays?

[unconscionable]

No, go right ahead. You do Hamlet, I'll do Rosencrantz and Guildenstern Are Dead.

[explosion]

And if anyone finds out it isn't true, we take them out, Godfather-style.

A movie which I wrote and directed, of course.

[unconscionable]

Love your work. Shame there's no cinema here hey.

[explosion]

Yet.

We could always put on plays. I think the town would love a performance every now and then. It'd break up the half-naked festivals.

[unconscionable]

There's that troupe, they do a show occasionally. Not my scene, I haven't acted since we lost the regional Greek theatre competition in high school.

That reminds me, though. Your magic items. They need to be stuff you know about? I mean, if I wanted a guide for how to build a piano, could you wiggle your nose and wish it up?

[explosion]

I could.

And if I didn't know it, being a telepath is very handy. It makes sure I don't make any mistakes.

[ Which begs the question from Wanda "Let's Take Shortcuts Because of Trauma" Maximoff: ]

Why would you want a guide to build a piano? I could give you the piano.

[unconscionable]

I know. But then it would be a gift from you.

Besides, I like to keep busy. Learn new things.

[explosion]

I would consider the music you play to be a gift to me.

I could give you a guide to build a piano. But a "How to For Dummies" is not parts.

You have to be very careful when you ask a witch for things. Who do you think inspired the genies to be cheeky?

[unconscionable]

Oh, I don't play. House does, or I'm pretty sure he does. And I made all the keys, and I traded for a bunch of wood, but I don't know anything about pianos, really, so I don't know how to turn that into something that makes music.

What do witches want? I'd offer you my firstborn but she'd probably be pissed.

[explosion]

[ She's glad they're not face-to-face. She knows her expression falls at the mention of taking a firstborn. ]

This witch drives a very, very hard bargain. One that puts fear into every man and woman.

A favor in the future.

[unconscionable]

Ooh, that is a classic, actually. Do I get a fairy tale clause? You know, if I'm kissed by a princess or I learn your real name...

[explosion]

Hm.

I think so. If a princess kisses you, you will spend your days as a very annoying frog and your nights as a man dressed in very bright, obnoxious pink. No one will be able to look at you. If you speak of this to anyone, I will turn you into a very old, dilapidated carriage no one wishes to use.

I told you. I'm a very mean witch who happens to be very fond of fairy tale clauses.

[unconscionable]

No kissing princesses, got it.

[ He tentatively sends her a trickle of his deep amusement at this message, since he's tickled by it but can't send laughing emojis and refuses to think "lol". ]

[explosion]

[ She's endeared.

While he doesn't think in emoji, she does: 🤣 ]

This is a very strange way for you to communicate, isn't it?