explosion | RUBILYKSKOYE INBOX.

For you? I have two and a half.

I'll try to keep it quick. You know how to do this.. kind of thing, right? [ He really hates saying the word "telepathy". ] You're the expert.

Reading minds? Yes. I know a little something about it.

[ "Expert". She likes that term. It's warm and good and doesn't imply losing free will. ]

What do you need, House?

Is there any way to like, block it out? Put the dial down to 1? All of these voices in my head sometimes it's.. distracting.

[ And painful. ]

Yes. But it takes time and practice. You're not going to get it in a day.

[ Just to set expectations. ]

I can teach you if you want. But it will involve being in your head.

[ Full disclosure. ]

I was kind of hoping you'd say sure and give me the telepathic version of a beta blocker. You're already in my head, though. Usually wearing lacy underwear and not much else. Just so you know.

[ Full disclosure. ]

[ She chuckles, allowing him to hear it. ]

What colour is the underwear?

Red.

[ Of course. ]

Hm. Is this when I admit that that's actually me? You've found out my secret.

[ She's quiet for a moment, although she allows him to feel her still, warm and as soft as lace. She wishes to travel down this path and tease him and have him tease her back, but he's come to her with a problem and she wishes to take it seriously.

Wanda hesitates. After Westview, she never wants to slip into anyone's subconscious again, changing their name or rewriting their life story. ]

I could put a beta blocker in your head, but… I don't think you would want that. You'd want to be able to control the noise yourself.

[ It's taken some getting used to. Not just the talking, but having another presence in his mind, like someone always sitting just behind one shoulder. When he lets himself think about it, House wonders if it's worrying how quickly it's become normal, whether that says anything about how his brain works. Whether he's grateful to no longer be alone with his thoughts.

She's right, though. ]

Yeah. I'm used to noise. I'm not used to being tuned in to everyone's dinner plans. It's like being on a subway car.

Where everyone speaks so loudly, and you can hear every single voice when you're used to a nonsensical chorus you could eventually shut out.

[ It comes across as slightly tired, which is a testament to how being around House has chipped away at some of her walls.

Even though she's spent years like this, it's always the same. The voices are sometimes loud. Often it feels like going to a concert where everyone sounds like they're speaking and shrieking at the same volume. Other times, it drowns her. Wanda doesn't like to admit it when that happens.

There isn't any silence, not even in this town. But Wanda's good at pretending these days. ]

Have you gotten headaches from it?

Yeah, a couple.

[ More than a couple. Though he knows some of those are caused by other things -- stress, side effects, not sleeping enough, not getting enough coffee. Wanda isn't the only one lowering her walls. ]

I can ignore most of it most of the time. But it's like overhearing a conversation in a language you almost know. My mind.. wants to focus on it. Wants to figure it out.

Hm.

It sounds like you need to stop being so curious about it, but that is like asking water to stop being wet.

[ And is difficult to do. Even Wanda struggles sometimes, but she supposes her relationship with reading minds goes deeper and is trickier than his ever will be. She can control them; he can respond and react to them. She has to remember it's a shallower relationship, one that she'll never quite understand. ]

I used to be like that. It drove me sick. I found I had to pull myself away from it. I didn't need to know about everything I heard. Why did I care if Svetlana wanted pot roast and Bela's heel broke?

[ Like asking water to stop being wet pretty much covers it. House can no more stop himself from being interested in the possibility of new information than he can stop himself breathing.

Wanda might feel a thread of defeat and resignation, laced with the awareness that he was right to be cynical. It's just more pain, after all. He's used to that.

Still, he can try. ]

So I need to keep my mind on something else.

Yes.

[ Easier said than done, she knows. ]

Or you remind yourself that if you focus on this thread, you miss out on a thread you actually want to follow. It's not reasonable for anyone to be able to juggle more than a handful of balls. Voices in your head are the same thing. You risk wearing yourself thin.

[ Wanda hesitates for a long, palpable moment. ]

If I didn't have my brother, I would not have been able to tell the actual voice from the thought. That way of living would've been more dangerous for me.

[ The sorrow in her voice -- thoughts -- is almost palpable, like catching the scent of someone after they've just left the room. ]

Is your brother like you?

He wasn't psychic like me.

[ Good lord, the world wouldn't be able to cope with that.

Although she misses Pietro fiercely, and feels that familiar discomfort when talking about him like he isn't here to interject (how can he when he's dead?), there's warmth to her thoughts. Even though he's gone where Wanda couldn't follow when Snapped, she always recalls him with undeniable fondness. ]

But he was fast—very fast. He moved fast, thought fast, spoke fast. He was always impatient, so it made sense his powers were impatient.

Sounds like a tough guy to have as a brother.

[ Despite that fondness and warmth, House knows the score. Or at least he thinks he does. ]

Able to run circles around you to pull your pigtails. Always bugging you and you couldn't keep up or talk to him how you wanted to.

[ A pause. He doesn't have any siblings. Maybe it would have been an easier childhood if he'd had someone to share it with. ]

You must miss him a lot.

He was very annoying.

[ Wanda considers downplaying it, but: ]

I miss him annoying me every day.

[ Ten years without Pietro—or close to it. Wanda's not quite sure what the math is anymore, what with the Blip stealing five years from her. But is it really theft if she preferred it? ]

You would have liked him. He was a smartass like you. He would've told me he hated you but then he would have sought you out all the time to try and one-up you. [ She laughs. ] You both would've been very insufferable together.

[ Maybe that's why she likes House so much. Not because he reminds her of Pietro—not at all; he's not quite as impatient as he is, and there's too much of a strange undertone to that if she was to claim that he reminds her of Pietro—but because he fills a void Pietro left behind: it's simply too easy to be around him. The reckless energy obscuring a deep compassion for other people. ]

It sounds like he would have been a challenge.

[ They definitely would have been insufferable. And might have caused considerable property damage. But he's focusing on something else right now. ]

I like it when you laugh. I think it's been a while since you let yourself be like this. It's nice.

[ She's grateful he can't see her. She's blushing. ]

I come from a town where laughter has been outlawed.

[ It's not a complete lie. Most people who make her laugh are dead (Sam Wilson and Clint Barton being notably alive exceptions). It feels like the same thing. ]

I'm sure you'll come to regret saying that soon. I have a very ugly laugh.

You have a great laugh. You should do it more often. As well as other noises of delight and orgasmic pleasure.

[ #justsaying ]

[ He really is trying to kill her via blushing. ]

If only someone would give me a reason to make any of those sounds.

[ She sighs dramatically. Wanda thinks to leave it at that, but this is House, and he's nothing if not a bad influence. ]

It's so hard to find a funny man who can make me laugh and come.

Now I clearly need to make you do both at the same time.

You really think you can?

[ She makes a doubtful "hm" sound across the 'line'. ]

I don't know… You seem so easily distracted.

RUBILYKSKOYE INBOX.

gasp he doth appear!

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