explosion | RUBILYKSKOYE INBOX.

If you prefer, I could always tap in so he can say, 'Wanda, stop threatening to kill everyone who hits me. I miss John.'

[ That's her worry, too. There's a noticeable pause in her thoughts. She doesn't want to pile it on—she wants to be a glass-half-full kind of girl again—but sometimes it's good to share. ]

I'm worried about that, too.

I didn't realize he was struggling. And I think I don't need to tell you that he doesn't seem like the type to tell anyone that he is, which makes it harder to get ahead of it.

[ That first thought gets a wave of barely concealed fondness, because it's nice to have someone take his side in that. ]

I knew. He hid it until he couldn't. Then I thought I could just magic it away, and when that didn't work (because my magic does absolutely fuck all to the transformation) I went off in a snit and he turned into that thing. His worst self. Did you meet it?

What did you try?

[ If John's magic didn't work, would Wanda's? ]

I didn't. I'm not too sure if I am glad about that. He's hurting so much.

[ If she could've helped, then Wanda wishes that she hadn't been preoccupied with the boarding house and had been there. Even if she couldn't, she wished that she had been there. But she supposes it's better late than never. (She's experienced never.) ]

Are you okay?

I had control of his nervous system, released oxytocin to stimulate his alpha receptors the way opium does, but it didn't stick. Lessened his pain, tried to ease his withdrawal symptoms, put my hands into his actual chest to keep his heartrate even when the chemical flood just made everything worse. Mostly he ended up vomiting black stuff everywhere - same stuff that was a part of him once he transformed. I've tried with others, too, nothing I do can stop the transformation or reverse it, it's like a totally different kind of energy to what I do. Fucking frustrating. Plus I overdid it enough that now he's all flinchy if I even fix a fat lip. I think we're better off focusing on restraining them monster than saving the man. I thought I had it, but it can phase through matter and the ooze is hard to nail down.

[ Christ. ]

Or you have to be able to change the matter so you can control it like a puppet.

[ Everything can be controlled. Everything. Wanda doesn't wish to believe that there's anything that can't be. That's now how the world is built. ]

He'll stop flinching in time. House is… not used to what we can do. He's used to stitches and bandaids and things naturally healing. I think he is more afraid of himself than of you. He would know you did what you could to help him, not hurt him.

[ In case he's worried. It's how Vision had been with her in Westview: doubtful, flinching, deeply concerned about what she could do to him. She understands what it's like to be on the receiving end of such a reaction. ]

You didn't answer me.

Are you okay?

Me? I've been through worse. Right now our focus should be House.

Sometimes it's good to split focus. It helps someone feel less hyper-fixated on.

[ But she understands, so: ]

I want to help him however I can. And you, too. But I fear overstepping.

[ It's what she's damn good at, after all. ]

Listen, I met House because he decided my eyes were a symptom of some rare medical disease and decided that was his business, and he hasn't actually gotten any less invasively nosy since then. It doesn't bother me. I appreciate your help.

[ She can't help but laugh. ]

He's very, very annoying, isn't he?

I'll help in any way I can. You just let me know. And I'll make sure he knows, even though we both know he won't ask for it. I know what it's like to have people fear you for something that's inherently you, and I don't want that for him.

A monster is a monster but the monster isn't the man.

I dunno. Every human is monstrous. Most just don't transform about it. But yeah, he doesn't believe me when I tell him I've already forgiven him, so it might not get through his thick skull. Come bitch to me if he's an idiot. Maybe together we can get him through this.

Should we have a dedicated day to bitch about House? Maybe Sunday brunches where we sip tea and spill it at the same time?

And bikkies?

Do you think I would allow us to have Sunday brunch to shit talk House and not have bikkies?

The shame you must feel.

So much shame. Should never have made such a grievous mistake. But yeah, a Sunday brunch sounds good.

Do we have a few before we tell him what he's missing out on the best bikkies in the world?

The company obviously wonderful, too. And you.

And me. Let's keep it between us for now. Don't want him to think we're planning an intervention.

That's a good idea.

[ One she hadn't considered. She really doesn't wish for House to shut either of them out. ]

Hopefully, we can tell him when he feels more open to it. I don't like the look of defeat on his face. It makes his eyes less bright, like the ocean is sad.

That's really poetic.

When I'm inspired, it just comes out. Feel free to call me Wandaspeare, but know that many will feel insecure when they hear that name.

There are probably people here who don't know Shakespeare? If House can take credit for Led Zoe's riffs you can pinch a sonnet.

He takes credit for those riffs? The audacity of this man!

[ And yet, so in character that Wanda isn't surprised at all. ]

You won't Et tu, Brute? me if I claim I wrote those plays?

Edited (be good if i spelt it right) 2023-08-01 00:54 (UTC)

No, go right ahead. You do Hamlet, I'll do Rosencrantz and Guildenstern Are Dead.

And if anyone finds out it isn't true, we take them out, Godfather-style.

A movie which I wrote and directed, of course.

Love your work. Shame there's no cinema here hey.

Yet.

We could always put on plays. I think the town would love a performance every now and then. It'd break up the half-naked festivals.

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