[ wanda wants to say that she's as right as rain. she feels fine. but she knows that she doesn't—and after what felwinter bore witness to before... she doesn't think she should lie at all. ]
[ is that how being checked up on works? wanda's pretty sure she's messing this up, but! she thinks she can translate "i'm managing" to what it truly means. perhaps felwinter shouldn't be left alone to manage by himself. ]
You shouldn't have to do it alone if you don't need to.
[ if wanda was kinder or gentler, perhaps she would take the supposed L and deter from wandering down this road. but she doesn't think felwinter is someone who appreciates being coddled, even if that's not what she intends to do.
she'd grown up with pietro who had been one of the most stubborn people she'd ever met. felwinter's a lot like him in that regard. ]
Why doesn't it count?
[ she doesn't wish to make him uncomfortable, but when presented with an opportunity, she thinks it's only fair to gently question. after all, he'd helped her when she didn't know she needed it most and had done so when met with some very intense resistance and imagery. ]
[It shouldn't be about him. That's just not how things work between Risen like himself and the mortal Ghostless. Even without his own personal brand of awkwardness, it's an unfamiliar concept as a whole.]
You needn't worry about me. I can take care of myself.
[Friends. Is that what they are? He'd never been particularly good at friendship, even among his own kind. He thinks of a very stubborn Warlord who once insisted that he had no friends, only people he protects, and wonders when he came to apply the same sentiment to himself.
Perhaps when almost everyone he was remotely close to had died.]
All the more reason for me to help. I can handle beasts, and whatever else may be out there.
[That's the easy part. It's everything else he's struggling with. And maybe part of him wants to ask her how she copes with it, but that seems unfair now he's seen some of her own struggles first-hand.]
Getting out of town. Having a task to focus on. It will help.
[ it sounds like that's what he wants. it's not something wanda can judge. hadn't westview been a break? (even though it had caused more reason to take a longer break… no one ever said wanda did things the easy way.) ]
A break is never a bad thing. Sometimes things here can get a little repetitive. Sometimes you feel stuck. Powerless.
[ he's seen her at her most powerless, even though she had been at her most powerful. she knows the desire to escape well. ]
I have no doubt you will fix what needs to be fixed.
But just know you don't always have to do it by yourself.
[Though he's not sure why he's openly admitting to it. Perhaps because she had done so first.]
I know how I would normally deal with some of the things I have seen broadcast on DeerNet lately. Some of the things I've seen happening in the streets. But these people are not Risen, and this is not the Dark Age. Things are different here.
Back home, the people I know would have apprehended them and put them in a cell.
I don't know if that's helpful at the end of the day. They always come back. At least when they are dead, it is a one-way trip.
[ is that a little too morbid? wanda thinks felwinter won't think her awful for saying it. the avengers have a code, and it's a code that wanda respects... but she thinks that, at times, it's a code that gets them into more trouble than they need. ]
I know there's a middle ground somewhere. I haven't been able to find it.
Precisely. The Iron Decree forbids killing of Ghosts and final deaths. But if it serves to protect our enemies more than it protects our people, what good is it?
I was very unpopular among the Iron Lords for my willingness to do what others would not.
[And despite not caring about people's opinions of him, Felwinter is glad that Wanda understands his point of view.]
Edited (i can spell i swear) 2022-09-09 09:24 (UTC)
I'm not surprised. People hate what they're afraid of.
[ would wanda apply this to herself? not completely. it's different. felwinter would understand how one rule applies to him and one rule applies to everyone else, at least. ]
Sometimes you need to do what others can't. Sometimes that's what needs to be done to protect others.
You have to live with it. They don't. All that matters is what you feel about it and if you can live with yourself.
I also don't begrudge them their opinions. They wanted to put an end to centuries of Risen fighting amongst themselves. It was only our methods that differed.
[ a lot, but, you know—this is one of the first times wanda's coming to terms with it. ]
A lot of people were afraid of me. They always felt that what I could do was weird.
And then they thought I was dangerous because I accidentally hurt people. I feel like no matter how good your intentions are, people are still going to think badly of you no matter what. Sometimes it's just best to let them.
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I'm honestly not sure.
How are you?
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[He's definitely not managing.]
I'll be going out to help with construction of the outpost west of Trench. I just wanted to check in before I left.
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[ is that how being checked up on works? wanda's pretty sure she's messing this up, but! she thinks she can translate "i'm managing" to what it truly means. perhaps felwinter shouldn't be left alone to manage by himself. ]
You shouldn't have to do it alone if you don't need to.
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[He might be deliberately missing the point.]
Do you need anything? While I'm still here.
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[ she sees you, felwinter. ]
I need to help you. Would you accept that as an answer?
[ wanda chuckles; she sincerely doubts that. ]
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The point was to make sure that you're ok. That doesn't count.
[Though he feels... guilty, perhaps, for denying her. Which is strange for a man who could not care less what others think of him or his actions.]
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she'd grown up with pietro who had been one of the most stubborn people she'd ever met. felwinter's a lot like him in that regard. ]
Why doesn't it count?
[ she doesn't wish to make him uncomfortable, but when presented with an opportunity, she thinks it's only fair to gently question. after all, he'd helped her when she didn't know she needed it most and had done so when met with some very intense resistance and imagery. ]
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[It shouldn't be about him. That's just not how things work between Risen like himself and the mortal Ghostless. Even without his own personal brand of awkwardness, it's an unfamiliar concept as a whole.]
You needn't worry about me. I can take care of myself.
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They worry about their friends who are capable of taking care of themselves. It can't be helped.
[ 😊 we're making the friendship bracelets as we speak. ]
And, no.
I won't not worry about you.
Repairing anything in the Trench can be dangerous, even when it involves people of very high skill.
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Perhaps when almost everyone he was remotely close to had died.]
All the more reason for me to help. I can handle beasts, and whatever else may be out there.
[That's the easy part. It's everything else he's struggling with. And maybe part of him wants to ask her how she copes with it, but that seems unfair now he's seen some of her own struggles first-hand.]
Getting out of town. Having a task to focus on. It will help.
[He thinks.]
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[ it sounds like that's what he wants. it's not something wanda can judge. hadn't westview been a break? (even though it had caused more reason to take a longer break… no one ever said wanda did things the easy way.) ]
A break is never a bad thing. Sometimes things here can get a little repetitive. Sometimes you feel stuck. Powerless.
[ he's seen her at her most powerless, even though she had been at her most powerful. she knows the desire to escape well. ]
I have no doubt you will fix what needs to be fixed.
But just know you don't always have to do it by yourself.
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[Though he's not sure why he's openly admitting to it. Perhaps because she had done so first.]
I know how I would normally deal with some of the things I have seen broadcast on DeerNet lately. Some of the things I've seen happening in the streets. But these people are not Risen, and this is not the Dark Age. Things are different here.
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[ wanda has a feeling that it may not involve holding hands and gently tugging someone along. but she's been wrong many times before. ]
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[He's not ashamed of that.]
I've never hesitated to do what is necessary, even if it meant breaking my oath.
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I don't know if that's helpful at the end of the day. They always come back. At least when they are dead, it is a one-way trip.
[ is that a little too morbid? wanda thinks felwinter won't think her awful for saying it. the avengers have a code, and it's a code that wanda respects... but she thinks that, at times, it's a code that gets them into more trouble than they need. ]
I know there's a middle ground somewhere. I haven't been able to find it.
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I was very unpopular among the Iron Lords for my willingness to do what others would not.
[And despite not caring about people's opinions of him, Felwinter is glad that Wanda understands his point of view.]
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[ would wanda apply this to herself? not completely. it's different. felwinter would understand how one rule applies to him and one rule applies to everyone else, at least. ]
Sometimes you need to do what others can't. Sometimes that's what needs to be done to protect others.
You have to live with it. They don't. All that matters is what you feel about it and if you can live with yourself.
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[Not about that, at least.]
I also don't begrudge them their opinions. They wanted to put an end to centuries of Risen fighting amongst themselves. It was only our methods that differed.
You sound like you speak from experience.
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[ a lot, but, you know—this is one of the first times wanda's coming to terms with it. ]
A lot of people were afraid of me. They always felt that what I could do was weird.
And then they thought I was dangerous because I accidentally hurt people. I feel like no matter how good your intentions are, people are still going to think badly of you no matter what. Sometimes it's just best to let them.
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I want to show you something. Are you busy?
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[ wanda laughs; she likes her little mum jokes. ]
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If that's too far, I can come to you.
[ in a blink of an eye, even! ]
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[Sat under the Guardian Sapling, as he tends to when he needs some peace of mind.]
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my apologies! i thought i had replied to this.
No worries!
❤️!!
Please excuse how long this got.
i love this!
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